Stop Apologizing!

Recently a person came into my life and while it's still very new it's fascinating to be witness to a new relationship. 

It used to be hard for me to make friends. I did not feel I had much to offer and really I didn't because I wasn't really sure who I was or what value I had to offer anyone. Through a lot of work I have opened up and realize I really do have something offer and by gosh, people like me. What a concept. 

Now, back to this new person in my life...she is interesting. Very intelligent and beautiful with a good sense of humor. A single mom, she struggles with where she's been and where she's going. Sound familiar? 

Well here is my "Aha" moment from our most recent conversation - when we are talking she spends a significant amount of time apologizing. She is sorry to bother me, sorry to sound this way or sorry to sound that way or sorry to not be available or sorry she isn't more stable or sorry she isn't more, (insert any number of things). I don't mean just using the word, "sorry"; I mean by way of dismissing what you have said as having any value. I just want to shake her and say, "YOU MATTER DAMMIT!"

This sounds silly right? Think about it though, how often are you apologizing and you don't know it? Stop it! Right now! I'm serious! 

I am just as guilty yet now that I am aware of it I will work to consciously remove it from my conversations unless I really am sorry for something. 

We do not need to apologize for who we are. Ever. If you have truly done something wrong and are truly sorry for it that's one thing, but let's stop apologizing for being who we are. Let your freak flags fly my friends! Rejoice in your oddness. Be one with your flaws and embrace them. Take the power away from everyone else and own your weird. Stop apologizing and start living the life you want! Let everyone else apologize to YOU!

Sorry, I got a little carried away there. 

Good, your smiling! Now go do something great! You have value and you matter!